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Some useful general advice for parents of children with learning difficulties
Although children with learning difficulties often have some inherent characteristics that may predispose them to have difficulties, the degree to which these propensities are expressed is very greatly modifiable by the environment in which a child grows up.
At no time in history have children generally been subjected to the level of environmental stress that they are subjected to now. Many more children are being pushed beyond their natural tolerance levels to display symptoms that can affect their health, (e.g. eczema, asthma, glue ear, headaches) and their behaviour (e.g. ability to concentrate, communicate, stamina, balance and control).
The nature of the over-stimulation from noxious stimuli takes various forms. The following examples are just an illustration:
Information overload from:
• noise
• travel
• TV/video/radio
• computers/mobile phones
Pollution from:
• junk food/sweets/chocolate/crisps
• fizzy drinks
• coffee
• flavour enhancers/colourings/preservatives
• antibiotics/drugs/hormones
• smoke/gas fumes
• petrochemicals/toxic metals and chemicals
• dust/perfumes
Lack of:
• adequate sleep
• fresh air
• exercise
Emotional insecurity due to:
• family
• school
• social situations
• financial and peer pressure or conflicts
Electromagnetic stress from:
• electrical energy appliances
• power lines
• vehicles/machinery
• communication systems
Many of these things are outside of our control, but health management means doing the best you can to manage those things over which we do have some influence or control.
Food
• get a good quality water filter and drink lots of filtered water or unadulterated natural water, as well as using it for cooking
• buy food in the most fresh and unadulterated state possible
• eat organic where possible as it contains up to 80% more nutrients
• eat lots of fresh fruit and vegetables, pulses and whole grains and wash well
• steam or bake food rather than fry
• cut out or drastically reduce sweets, biscuits, commercial snacks
• eat fruit between meals for snacks
• fruit juice with half fizzy water is cheaper and less harmful than pop
• read labels of all processed foods carefully and make healthy choices
• prepare as much food as you can yourself
• food combining is excellent (the Hay system)
• eat a well balanced diet of whole grains, starches, some proteins and lots of fruit and vegetables daily
• incorporate fatty acids into your daily diet – olive oil, evening primrose oil, flax oil or linseed oil
• eat oily fish such as herring, mackerel, sardines, salmon or trout
• vegetables are more nutritious if eaten raw, steamed or lightly stir fried
• freshly juiced vegetables are great for vitamins and enzymes
• enjoy a wide variety of different foods – don't overdo the use of one food as you may become sensitised to it
• use herbs to add the variety of interesting flavours, textures and colours
Give additional supplementation of good quality multi vitamins and minerals. Give at least 15mg of zinc in addition and ensure a good supply of essential fatty acids from fish, seeds, nuts (not peanuts) whole grains and perhaps some supplementary oil capsule.
Please note that some of the cheaper, more popular food supplements are so loaded with colouring and artificial flavours they can "set off" vulnerable children in the way you are actively trying to avoid!
Enjoy relaxing family meals together to improve conversation, conviviality, communication and understanding togetherness.
Lifestyle
• restrict TV to no more than 1 hour per day
• encourage books, reading, creative and imaginative play and activities (instead of mobile phone/computer games)
• ensure plenty of fresh air and physical exercise in interesting and socially enjoyable ways
• make sure your child gets enough sleep
Breathing for health
Oxygen is the most essential element to sustain life. Without oxygen for just 2 minutes the brain already begins to die. We have observed that many children with learning difficulties cannot breathe properly. In particular, their diaphragms are not working properly. This condition has adverse affects on every aspect of their physical, physiological, auto-immune and mental functioning. Teaching them diaphragm breathing such as is taught in Yoga, and practising it for a few minutes every day, can have a very beneficial effect on your child. It can be enhanced by your child learning a wind instrument or joining a choir.
Emotional intelligence
Emotional intelligence is even more important for the well being of children with learning difficulties. Tremendous pressure is being put on schools, parents and children to raise the standards of maths and literacy. No one can dispute the value of these skills. In a time of rapid change perhaps the most important kind of intelligence is emotional intelligence - the ability to run one's own brain and remain sane and in control of one's feelings. This kind of intelligence is developed through play, drama, sports, music, literature and communication with fellow human beings.
Discipline
Give them encouragement by looking for, recognising and praising good and appropriate behaviour. Immediate situations and needs may seem pressing but remember that you are bringing up your children for life. Always try to stay calm, patient and in control, even if your child does not appear to listen to reason and common sense. Do not deny him/her the opportunity of seeing and hearing it – it does all go in at some level, even if they may appear to be unresponsive immediately. In time it will enable your child to build up a powerful resource of knowledge and experience which, when he or she is ready to call upon it, may well make the whole difference to their future successful fulfilment in life.
Be matter of fact about behaviour that is not acceptable while making it quite clear that you love them and that it is the behaviour not them as a human being that you are disapproving of.
Parental Strategies
Accept that your child has a problem. This is why your child may not be following instructions easily or remembering what to do. This is a reason, not an excuse. Be firm, insistent, patient and realistic in your demands. Do not set your child up to fail and remember that practice is the mother of skills.
Acknowledge what your child is experiencing. Acknowledge and talk about different things so that they can develop the vocabulary to express their feelings to create rapport. Feed them questions which may help them to think and find their own way out of the difficulties they experience.
Clearly worked out goals with manageable plans, strategies and routines for fulfilling them, understood and agreed by all concerned, are great aids, as are clear, practical common-sense rules of how routine activities are carried out. They can be written down and reminders posted in appropriate places.
Have your child repeat back instructions in their own words. Have them look at you when speaking …..
In a family your child needs to be taught how to know his or her place. He/she may well have a difficulty but every other member of the family must not be sidelined because of it.
Have quality time, relaxing and being active together with your children. Make sure to have time away from them.
Set an example to your child
Set an example to your children to encourage the right tastes, values and behaviour in food, exercise, language, hygiene, personal conduct, respect, care, attention, responsibility and good will. Parents who do not read, write, discuss things intelligently and behave sensibly can hardly expect it from their children.
If you do use rewards as an incentive, recognition and praise should be enough. Set a good example by rewarding with healthy treats.
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